January 2011
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My Underpants and I wish you a Happy New Year.
They are Super Cary Underpants.
I know, you are jealous. It is ok. Own it.
December 2010
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Talented and Grifted.
In the third grade there was a test. And a room. And interviews. And a letter home.
Respite from the dull goings on of room 102 at Gregory Heights Elementary School had been prescribed by the authoritative educators. I would be let free from my regular class, put into a van and taken down the road to a room in another, more modern, ranch style school along with emissaries from other nearby...
A number
217
A number.
136
A number.
160
A number.
144
A number.
197
A number.
125
A number.
110
A number.
204
A number.
Arbitrary.
A number, picked out of a magazine or the low end range of a healthy weight scale, unobtainable, looming, taunting. What a body cannot be, can never make happen, does not feel right.
A number.
Will not rule me.
I am not a number.
I am a person. I am...
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Circular Neurosis Sweepstakes
Me: I am stressed out.
Him (concerned): Why are you stressed out?
Me (flapping arms trying to release tension): I am stressed out because I am on vacation and should be relaxed but instead I am tense so that makes me all stressed out! Why am I stressed out.
Him (looking at me): You win. Congratulations, you win the Circular Neurosis Sweepstakes.
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11 in '11
I have one. I don’t have eleven. I have one.
I want to be more present in my life.
By that I mean, I want to leave work at work, be present there as I am there, but when I leave and the glass door closes behind me each night - it stays there and does not tear me up all evening.
I want to be more present in my family life, and that will mean finding peace with the external world.
I...
Reblogging myself - that did not work.
2009 felt like a fucking marathon, it felt like hitting the wall over and over and then pushing through. Well today, on this, the last day of 2009, as I ran past Oak Street Beach and mile 10, I decided and I know for sure in 2010 I will run a real marathon.
After the last 12 months I know I have the endurance and the sheer force of will to finish.
Anyway, this is what I wrote.
I...
Words to live by.
frageelay:
Don’t qualify apologies.
Send thank you notes.
Don’t tell people how to grieve.
Risk saying ‘I love you’ even if the other person might not reply in kind.
Don’t ask people why they don’t have kids and/or a spouse.
Try not to say anything behind someone’s back that you couldn’t say to their face (I struggle mightily with this one but it’s a good goal).
If it comes in a giant...
sarkastickunt asked: Matilda sleeps every night with the blanket you gave her.
Which leads me to ask this question...
Do you sleep completely covered, or does one toe need to peek out?
Which leads me to ask this question...
Do you sleep completely covered, or does one toe need to peek out?
sarkastickunt asked: Matilda sleeps every night with the blanket you gave her.
Which leads me to ask this question...
Do you sleep completely covered, or does one toe need to peek out?
Which leads me to ask this question...
Do you sleep completely covered, or does one toe need to peek out?
My iPhone Calorie Counter Ap doesn't have a Yummy...
so this whole “Nutritionally responsible” thing is gonna have to wait until tomorrow.
Come here, Nanwich, come here and get into my mouth with your sweet potatoes and fennel and apple and roasted pork butt and the side of plantain chips…mmmmm……
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I have no idea who would play me in a movie
Someone once said Rebecca De Mornay, but I think that is ridiculous and only because they had run out of red headed celebrities and didn’t want to hurt my feelings. She was really hot in that one movie with the Blue Line train, but you know I am not tall, not thin, and my boobies are fairly sizable.
I would like to think Julianne Moore, but again with the not tall, not thin, sizable...
Who does that?
Who slathers on a coat of purple sparkle lipgloss then kisses their arm like that?
You know, without pushing up their sleeve first?
These lip shaped stains are a bitch.
Let’s all try real hard not to be assholes to each other, shall we?
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Six looks up from playing wii, “Mom, I am ready for breakfast. I’ll have one pancake, one waffle.”
And a side of reality check.
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On the practice of eating feelings
Feel your feelings.
Eat your dinner.
These acts should be separate.
When you mix them up, you just end up with a tummy ache and more feelings to eat.
This has been a message from the AshamedToSay Public Service Alert System.
The Elliptical
Now referred to as super snow elliptical, has a new home after 5 years with my neighbor Julie. She wheeled it to her house.
We are awaiting the arrival of a Treadmill that I saved pennies for about a year, ever since it became apparent that the Elliptical just wasn’t doing it for me and that we would need to replace it, since it was getting wobbly.
The Treadmill, which arrives next week,...
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Because there is love between brothers and sisters
At the sled hill. A boy screams, his father comes to his aid, taking him down the hill.
Dad: Are you ok, buddy?
Buddy: waaaaaaaahhhh
Dad: Where does it hurt?
Buddy: waaaaaaaahhhh (taps head)
Dad: You hit your head. You may have a concussion. Do you need to go home?
Buddy: un-huh.....
Dad to Sister: Gen, we are gonna go ok?
Gen: What!?! NO!
Dad: Your brother is hurt, we need to go.
Gen: I don't wanna! He is fine!
Dad: He hurt his head, we need to go.
Gen: Why? It's not like he uses his head anyway.
Buddy: Waaaaaahhhhhhhhh!
......
......
And that is why siblings are awesome. Buddy recovered and went to sled again.
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“Nothing says pummel me with snow like “I am pretending to be an Ewok.”
– AngryOldCoot to Six. Then he pummeled her with snow.